By Katrina Jansen-Buciuni, Editor in Chief
The morning of the ACT will be a day I’ll never forget.
Pure anxiety running through every bone of my body. Sickness in the pit of my stomach. And failure in the back of my mind. Why? Because I’m someone who can’t take standardized tests. It’s something I’ve always been challenged with and never seem to succeed at.
It’s a test. Let me say it again. A test. All your teachers try their best to prepare you for it. But what they don’t know is that there is no proper way of preparing for something like this. Teachers spend years teaching you everything you’re supposed to know, but by the time your junior year comes, you are supposed to forget all of that and learn the tips and tricks to accomplishing the ACT.
That just doesn’t make any sense to me.
I suppose you could just be a really good guesser. But I’m not good at that either. I’ve taken the ACT three times now and have come to the realization that this score means nothing. Absolutely nothing. It doesn’t define me or the glorious future that is going to unfold for me.
When I received my ACT score for the first time, I cried for about three days and sunk into a small depression. Not joking about that either. Hearing all the other kids talking about how well they did, and all you can do is just smile and nod because you don’t want anyone to think you’re stupid. I recall the feeling of just being completely frozen. You know when you’re outside too long in the cold? All your bones just feel numb and you’re trembling because it just won’t go away? Yeah, that’s exactly what it felt like.
Or you hope no one asks that heart-racing question, “What did you get on the ACT?” Should I lie or be completely honest? But I don’t want anyone to think I’m dumb. If I’m honest they’ll feel pity for me, and pity is worse.
As months passed and I continued to retake the ACT two more times, peace started to settle in my heart because I knew this score meant nothing. But I get it, at this moment it means everything to you. College. Scholarship money. Finally conquering something everyone hypes up.
Do not let something like this completely destroy you, like it did to me. I’m not being over dramatic when I say “completely destroyed” either. But what I learned from the process afterwards built me up to be stronger. I was determined when I filled out college applications that I wouldn’t become discouraged. I have a great GPA. I’m very involved in school and have plenty of community service hours completed. I am set. This is it.
At this point right now, I still don’t know what I’m going to do with my life. But what I do know is that I learned to become a stronger person from this standardized test. And I’m not talking about knowledge. I learned to grow a new type of confidence in myself and my life, declaring that I am worth more than a test score and demanding it should not define my life. This moment in life may feel like a dead end, but in reality you just hit a bump in the road. This will not matter in a year.
Do not become discouraged if you don’t do well on the ACT, because anything you set your mind to, you can achieve. I am a true believer of that.
So prepare the best you can and hope for the best. But never forget you are worth more than this score, and if colleges don’t recognize that, then move on and know you’re worthy and deserve better.
